parodeity: borsmenta @ DA (PUPPETS 🎧 trauma)
the dave of guy (just some dude) ([personal profile] parodeity) wrote in [community profile] lucybox2017-05-06 10:54 pm

ty wants to see dave put his foot in his mouth

[ today in alternate reincarnation aus i guess: what if instead of john egbert walking into his college room, his Destined Roomie (tm) it happened instead like this?

dave and rose don't really go to parties that often. it's not that they're opposed to socializing or anything, it's just not their Thing. dave is more likely to spend his free time dicking around on the internet or bothering his siblings and friends. the only changes memories have caused is an occasional interest in being alone. rose - well, rose tends to have her own things, and like dave she seems to be perfectly fine without the College Experience of parties. dave's pretty sure roxy is the only one who really actively seeks that kind of thing out, and that suits him fine.

so he's not really sure why he and rose agree to go to this party, except it's being thrown by a bunch of rose's more nerdy friends, people she's met in classes that dave doesn't take. and, well, if rose grabs dave's arm and tells him he has plans, dave is more likely than not to go "yeah, okay" or at least to let himself be dragged along as he protests and argues the entire way there.

he expects to try to stick to juice (he will go into people's fridges without worrying, whatever) and to chat with people randomly, and maybe if he's lucky there'll be fireworks, since this is supposedly a fourth of july thing?

he does not expect to recognize someone and he does not expect to need the mouth-to-brain filter that only sometimes functions periodically and so he kind of freezes up, points at his best friend and says ]


Dibs. [ louder than expected, although at least some people are drunk enough to just kind of snort and move on.

...rose laughs, pats his arm, and ABANDONS HIM, the lousiest excuse for a twin sister in the world (he would kill and die for her) and dave flounders. ]
I mean - shit. Shit, I can't save that one, oh my god. Is there a convenient balcony to fling myself off of.
windeity: (CAUTIOUS ♫ over the shoulder)

[personal profile] windeity 2017-05-07 05:32 am (UTC)(link)
[Yes I always want to see Dave put his foot in his mouth. That's a thing I will continually demand.

But okay. So here we are and it's a college experience and a college party and John Egbert...doesn't usually go to parties either? John has never been one for going to parties despite John being sociable enough. He'll spend time with people and he'll go do things but parties are never a thing that John does. So when John receives an invite from a friend of a friend and is told he should come, he does. He doesn't know how long he'll stay or even if he'll have fun, but he figures there's nothing to lose and if someone wants him to show up, he will.

So he's here and on his own, idly wandering with his hands in his pockets and chatting with a few people. It happens to be when he's leaving the lawn and entering the building that he suddenly hears a very loud, very male (and somewhat southern?) voice yell "Dibs." His eyes snap up and to attention, scanning before locking onto Dave and really, if his stupid finger wasn't in the air John never would have guessed it was Dave who just shouted. He sees the girl (and he thinks maybe he recognizes her as the Intimidating but Smart as Shit girl from one of his English lectures) pat his arm and abscond and Dave is alone and John...settles for tilting his head curiously.]


Uh. [Intelligent, Egderp.] ...hi? [Wait, no.] I think it would kill the atmosphere if you conveniently flung yourself off a convenient balcony.

[And anyway, if he did John wouldn't be able to learn why the fuck this is happening.]
windeity: (CONFUSED ♫ what the fuck)

[personal profile] windeity 2017-05-07 06:19 am (UTC)(link)
If you're going to the frat-boy thing you're going to need a toga. Or a lei, maybe? This doesn't exactly say luau but you could probably make it work Van Wilder-style. Plus Tumblr still exists. That shit's infinite. [There's another awkward grin because it's still a weird thing to say and Dave's playing it cool. John says stupid things more often than not and gets teased for it but he doesn't mind. That's usually among his friends. This, however, was something else.]

So um. I'm flattered? I think? But I'm not really...[...] "Dibs"?

windeity: (NEUTRAL ♫ he tried)

[personal profile] windeity 2017-05-07 06:40 am (UTC)(link)
[To his credit, John's not laughing in his face. On the other hand, John's not exactly sure how to respond either because it's hard to tell if the guy's serious or not and this doesn't happen to him, like, ever. It's not a secret that John isn't cool, has never been cool, probably never will be cool and he's okay with that. John will always just be himself and be happy that way, plugging along and doing what he wants to do.

So, to say that he's surprised anyone would call dibs on him in the first place is an understatement, and part of him is starting to think that Dave's maybe just playing an elaborate joke. Which, he can respect and all, but there's such a thing as overstretching it.]


Haha. [Yep. Sure did just say "haha" out loud.] That is definitely me, not cool enough to respect the rules of dibs. I don't even know the rules? [Oh my god why would you admit that out loud? Stupid, stupid, stupid.] Which means I guess I'll just...go so you can have dibs on somebody else. It's a pretty big party.

[Come on, feet. Let's move. Anytime now.]
windeity: (CURIOUS ♫ hm?)

[personal profile] windeity 2017-05-07 06:55 am (UTC)(link)
[He should go? He should definitely, absolutely move and maybe make another round with people and decide if it's worth staying but no. For whatever reason he makes zero movements to float off and do whatever and instead he continues to stare at Dave even as he idly pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose with one hand. Even hearing it explained, he's not sure where the logic is coming from and part of him wants to say "uh" and another part wants to say "are you trying to hit on me?" and another part wants to just shut his mouth and wander off and let somebody else deal with this but. No.

No. Things in this town have been sort of strange and unusual in ways he can't quite put a finger on and somehow even with the fact he gets along well enough with most people this is still the most interesting thing that's happened to him tonight. So instead of saying any of those things he looks down before lifting his eyebrows and facing Dave again.]


Wait, what's wrong with Ace Ventura? [He has an overshirt on but it's unbuttoned and clearly revealing his stupid shirt that also maybe has a few holes in it at the bottom he didn't notice. Ah well. Congrats, Dave, you have the attention of one dork.]
windeity: (CHINHANDS ♫ ah I see)

[personal profile] windeity 2017-05-07 07:17 am (UTC)(link)
Duh. His best work was in Dumb and Dumber. [You wanna go, Strider? He will talk stupid shit like this all night even if it means debating and defending his (quite frankly) shitty choices.] And how do you know how old I am? Maybe I'm just young-looking for my age. [Yeah he can't keep a straight face on that to save his life. But he looks at Dave's hand for a moment like he's debating if he wants to go through with it before he reaches out and firmly shakes his hand.]

John Egbert. And nah, it's Zoolander. [Somehow this is much better.]
windeity: (ARROGANT ♫ bastard)

[personal profile] windeity 2017-05-07 07:31 am (UTC)(link)
Why wouldn't that be a movie with character depth and watchability? I've probably watched it one-hundred and fifty times. [He absolutely has not, but it's definitely sitting back in his student apartment right now.] The whole story is awesome, too, it's like the ultimate underdog tale for guys who can't hero good and want to learn to do other good stuff too.

[It's a fucking stupid movie and he unironically loves the hell out of it.] What's not to like about whirlwind sharks though? [A shrug.] I don't know if I've ever had a favorite anything that's too popular so take that consideration out.
windeity: (THINKING ♫ thoughts)

[personal profile] windeity 2017-05-07 07:48 am (UTC)(link)
Uh. Yeah, maybe. [A sheepish grin follows but at this point John figures if Dave was trying to hold his attention so bad he can afford to let himself just be normal.] I'm working on it. How can you not be a fan of the hero rising up and defeating all that is evil? [He folds his arms over his chest then, also partially obscuring his silly shirt.] But B&T's still a pretty okay choice, so I guess we can maybe be friends.
windeity: (GRIN ♫ casual streetwear)

[personal profile] windeity 2017-05-07 08:03 am (UTC)(link)
You clearly haven't watched enough hero movies since that's, like, all there really is to it according to Hollywood. [He's not good at reading Dave and maybe he never will be, so he misses all of this entirely and just assumes they're bantering back and forth, not that he essentially just made Dave Strider probably the happiest person in the room.

On the other hand, that sincere sort of look returns as he shrugs again.]
I haven't really made a lot of movie-friends since I moved here. [That's a safer option than "I haven't really made a lot of friends in general." There are people he talks to, people he gets along with, people he exchanges notes and conversations with, and then there are friends. But even so...there's a grin.] But if that happens, then who're we getting to tell you when your taste sucks?
windeity: (DAVE ♫ lean)

[personal profile] windeity 2017-05-07 08:17 am (UTC)(link)
[He pauses for a minute to look at Rose, eyes widening a bit before he tries not to think about the fact she's watching and redirecting his attention on Dave again.]

The scary grimdark girl's your sister. Right. Of course she is. [There's a light laugh.] Pretty sure you're going to need a balance and opinion from someone who isn't your family. I probably have room in my schedule somewhere.

[But also he would never pass up that kind of opportunity? And obviously if he and Dave are friends he can coerce him into better movie choices himself. Clearly. On the other hand, the word "schedule" seems to make him think of something.] You sure you don't have other friends you want to catch up with?
windeity: (CHINHANDS ♫ with interest)

[personal profile] windeity 2017-05-07 08:31 am (UTC)(link)
Why would you want to? [He shakes his head slowly.] I thin if I had a sister I'd probably run the opposite direction from whatever romantic bullshit she's dealing with. Too much of a headache.

[But okay. While Dave is Much Better about being subtle, John's not and so he perks right up at the idea of having a new companion. With that though he's turning, not even bothering to see if Dave will follow just because he has a feeling that he will. Let's go find something to drink and go wander a bit.] Does the topic just extend to movies or can I trash your taste in other stuff, too?
windeity: (PEEK ♫ shamlessly)

[personal profile] windeity 2017-05-07 08:44 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, yeah. [Come along, Dave-cat. John also apparently doesn't mind roaming people's houses but he's a little more hesitant about snooping before eventually finding a can of soda on the counter and popping it open.] I'm not the one who can't appreciate such fine cinematography.

[But he rotates to lean against the counter, glancing down at his sneakers and hiding a grin behind the lip of the soda can.] Good enough for me. [On the other hand:] But being alone gets boring after a while too doesn't it?
windeity: (AFFRONTED ♫ excuse u)

[personal profile] windeity 2017-05-07 09:04 am (UTC)(link)
[Okay you do you, Strider. So Dave's up on the counter and John's next to him and leaning and here they are like they hadn't just met fifteen minutes ago.]

The city's huge. It's hard to imagine being alone even if you want to be anyway. And shut up? It's because I found a huge hole in my Ghostbusters shirt thanks to Casey so I had to switch last minute. What's your excuse?
windeity: (GRIN ♫ casually)

[personal profile] windeity 2017-05-07 09:10 am (UTC)(link)
I don't need to take notes since I can never aspire to be as cool as you. I may as well give up now, see myself out of here because I will never be on the level of Dave "too-cool-for-school" Strider. [Who. Is actually in all seriousness drinking from a goddamn juicebox. This is absurd.] Next you're going to tell me that tomorrow's wardrobe includes a Sesame Street shirt.

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