so age shenanigans "lucy what do you use your musebox for" nonsense threads and holiday cards

[parodeity]

[ one day dave strider wakes up and the tower isn't familiar or comfortable. it's place he's never been with weird trappings of familiarity. there are things that are clearly his or that he...thinks are his? turntables unfamiliar to him in specific except they're his exact set up. clothes in the closet a little too big for his frame, but the pajamas he'd been wearing are just black pants an a loose t-shirt so those are fine. there's stickers on the top of the bunk bed frame, the bed he woke up in, and some are sbahj. there are pictures pinned places he's mostly ignoring because they're too odd, and it's...

not his bedroom. it's not his apartment. after looking out a window, dave's pretty sure it's maybe not his planet.

which, okay. sburb has only just become a thing and already dave is pretty sure bullshit is par for the course. but a little more warning would have been nice? or any warning at all. the workbench in the room he woke up in is weird and a little unsettling and so dave goes...down the stairs because he hears stuff down there and smells.

food?

that is a weird thing to smell in the morning. what the fuck. he'll kind of peer around the corner with as much caution as he can muster, figuring he doesn't see his own corpse so either this doesn't go sideways at all or it just hasn't yet and - ]

Bro. [ deadpan neutral surprise, because, yeah. that's...no, he's younger, but still. hm. reluctantly, dave stops peering around the corner and drifts further into the room, regarding the kitchen being used as a kitchen with well but not perfectly hidden dismay and concern. ]

Comments

[splinten]

You can tell me the game gave me stupid clothing. I know.

[parodeity]

I think they look cool?

[ he would also say if pressed that puppets are probably cool if freaky though ]

[splinten]

[Dirk gestures at them.]

They're pantaloons. With leggings?

[Wait he hopes this doesn't short-circuit Dave by forcing him to argue against his own insults to himself?]

[parodeity]

You can make 'em work.

[ "nah rose puppets are cool" he can do this all day even though it pains him to do this ]

[splinten]

[Dirk is in pain.]

That is definitely not true, but thanks for tryin'.

[Not actually thanks. IT HURTS. This is probably why he changes back to his normal clothes so quickly. Or maybe he just doesn't want to wear pantaloons which. You know, is definitely possible.]

[parodeity]

[ can't dirk magically girl change into the pjs MEENAH AND VRISKA CAN, TOO ]

You really don''t like 'em?

[splinten]

[ISn'T THAT BECAUSE THEY'RE DREAMDEAD? I THOUGHT YOU NEED THE WARDROBIFIER]

They aren't what I'd choose for myself. [Although.] Usually you hate everything I choose for myself so I don't know how much that counts for anythin'.

[parodeity]

[ IDK THEY'RE MAGIC PAJAMAS THAT DON'T NEED TO WATCH AND ALWAYS FIT i think you can kinda do whatever with them and cannot be fucked to check if vriska flipped outfits when alive maybe if these idiots would change their damn clothes ]

Like what? You're not wearin' the kind of shit you usually do.

[ spats, polos, hats. ]

Well, gloves.

[splinten]

They're useful for the robot-building.

[Dirk is tempted to pull out a shirt to show Dave. Possibly just spam him with bad clothing until Dave breaks and admits he hates it. Except that would be messed up, so he should seriously not.

Right. It's okay. Chill, Strider. Dave will be fine.

He sits down beside Dave again.]

I've never worn spats or polos in my life. Hats would ruin this awesome hair. [He gives a shrug.] I've got this pair of blue and red boots that are apparently pretty bad.

[parodeity]

[ those...do not sound like spats.

also he kind of thinks dirk's hair is lame but ok ]

I don't really wear hats? No real reason, just not my thing.

[splinten]

It's cool. You always rock your look.

[parodeity]

My look is basically your look but more casual?

[splinten]

You do suits.

[parodeity]

Oh. I guess now that you mention it I've never seen you in one?

[ you, him. same difference! ]

[splinten]

You just met me.

[Oh. Him. Right.

God, that's hard to keep track of.]

You mean your Bro. Sorry, it keeps slippin' past me.

[parodeity]

Should I not...

[ he doesn't know how to think of them separate, yet. he hasn't had three years to untangle his thoughts about bro to even the degree he's managed eventually. ]

Uh, you keep callin' future-Dave me, too.

[splinten]

No, it is.... [Ugh. How to articulate this.] It's complicated. He is me, obviously, in his way, but he's a version of me with very different formative life differences, and I'd say some key differences in personality. So while I initially referred to him as 'me,' I ended up settling on more distancing language. I think it helps to reinforce the idea that the rules that existed between you and him aren't the rules that exist between me and you.

Likewise, I decided that the Bro I had in my timeline, an older version of you with a different life time, should be treated as a different person.

In this case, when I call future-Dave you, it's because I assume he is you, in the future. I'm not a timeline dude but my Heart senses seem to be indicating that. I have no problem changing my reference if you prefer it. Do you want me to change it?

[parodeity]

[ he's not sure. he's currently coasting on shit he hasn't done yet and rules he doesn't know, and so dave ignores the question for one of his own. ]

What rules exist?

[splinten]

[Ok he should have expected that as a question.]

You don't have to stick to 'em, since you didn't agree to them. It's stuff like neither of us can make unilateral decisions about the relationship, or no smuppets, or telling each other when we'll be back if we need to leave for space. There's a sort of buddy system for helping each other remember to eat and sleep too.

[parodeity]

[ why is this guy so into eating as a thing that occurs?????? ]

What d'you mean unilateral decisions?

[splinten]

Like... one of us can't just decide how our relationship without talkin' to the other. We can make decisions for ourselves on our own, obviously, that's a basic rule of autonomy that I seriously don't want to fuck with here, it's more shit like deciding I don't get to take our road trips anymore without even askin' me if that's what I want.

[parodeity]

[ that sounds nice and all but follow up more important question: ]

We go on roadtrips?

[ like. together? that dirk wants to be on???????? with dave? dave sounds utterly lost at this aside, although most of that made him feel pretty lost. this one is just...ridiculous, though. ]

But you don't even like - he doesn't even like - [ a vague aborted hand gesture meant to gather up all the trips to the store where dave was pretty much left in a boring unlit room on a cold concrete floor, what the fuck ]

[splinten]

[Yeah he should have realized that would be mindblowing. Here's another one to bowl Dave over.]

Yes. I like spending time with you. You're pretty great and I like your company.

[parodeity]

So...you'd want to go nosehair trimmer shopping???

[ w...why the fuck is that what came out of his mouth. dave gets the singular why the fuck did i say that expression he gets at least 30 times a day, his brow furrowing as he closes his mouth and contemplates death ]

[splinten]

[....]

I... don't think I need a nosehair trimmer, but if you wanted to, sure?

Are my nosehairs weirdly long?

[dave does he need to trim his nosehairs and you just never told him because future you waS TOO SHY OR SOMETHING???]