whatever
EPISODE 1: meeting
EPISODE 2: the latvian mob
EPISODE 3: a concussion
EPISODE 4: bench talk
EPISODE 5: break-in
[ what would someone following the number connected to dave strider notice during recon? well.
dave strider, thirteen, gangly and edging on getting taller but way too skinny, angular and bony in a way that says he could stand to eat more food more often. he constantly wears shades. he equally constantly wears long-sleeved shirts and jeans in the houston heat. dave is too careful to ever let that shirt ride up enough to show what's underneath, and he never lets his shades get jostled off his face in public.
the kid has more of an online presence than his brother. he runs a webcomic with an avant garde sense of style and some truly disturbing strips that occasionally seem to correspond with times his number has come up; he sells shit on the site sometimes, t-shirts or book compilations or keychains. the money isn't saved but tends to get spent on groceries. he trolls internet forms at random but does seem to speak regularly to at least three other kids, and has for at least three years. these conversations are all mostly superficial even though the kids are close. the deepest he ever gets in them is with rose lalonde, who lives in new york. sometimes they talk about his dreams.
to each of them he only has positive things to say about his brother, whom he idolizes.
the other half of his computer use seems to go to online school, which dave does all right on. he only occasionally misses deadlines, but more frequently turns shit in ahead of time. he participates haphazardly on the forums as required, but aside from an odd sense of humor and a decent grasp on the subjects, he doesn't say anything worth reading.
following dave in person is harder. he doesn't leave the apartment often except to go to the store, or occasionally the library. he has hung out in the park once or twice but always goes home the second his cellphone buzzes with a text. his interactions with other people are limited; he's polite and casually friendly and charming to the grocery store employees and the librarian, and he doesn't turn people away when they talk to him exactly, but he never discusses anything of note and always excuses himself pretty quickly. dave doesn't like to be touched and doesn't let it happen, never needing to flinch back because he moves faster than that, and doesn't let himself get in the position where someone will try to touch him.
at the store he gets apple juice and bread and peanut butter. or junk food that keeps longer, kept at the back of his closet. nothing he has to refrigerate or heat up. at the library he gets art and film books or photography collections or comics or shit like my teacher is an alien or animorphs or pretty much anything. he doesn't usually check them out to go back home, unless it's a thing for school. when he signs his name on anything it's a careful angular scrawl and he likes to do it in red - dave always keeps a red pen in his pockets. at the park he tends to sit on a bench with good sightlines and sometimes he'll feed birds bits of torn bread and sometimes he'll scroll through shit on his phone (tumblr, random sites, pesterchum) but mostly he just kind of sits there and listens to music.
he downloads a lot of music. sometimes he mixes up new shit and uploads it, sending it to his friends or occasionally just keeping it to himself. dave maintains some social media accounts but is weird about them. there are disjointed quotes or phrases and oddly angled pictures and he seems to treat them like some sort of joke only he gets, but he's almost dedicated to them like he doesn't seem to be to a lot of shit. there's a blog he used to update but doesn't any longer about tony hawk and other things and every glimpse into his mind through his words is unclear and a little off.
a lot of the time he seems to be in the apartment alone. he isn't always, despite appearances, and he knows it. there's a ton of surveillance equipment inside the apartment and dave treats the cameras and recording devices with a casual weariness and wariness. his brother is constantly monitoring both dave and the equipment; fucking with that would probably be a bad idea for anyone paying attention, but it might be possible to jack some of those frequencies, if you're careful.
inside the apartment he mostly stays in his room. when he comes out he's nervous and cautious but nothing ever shows on his face. even in the sanctity of his own room this is true; dave doesn't emote when he can help it and even when he jumps when a trap goes off, his expression doesn't change an iota. when he speaks his voice is low and too-texan, but he doesn't usually unless he's outside of the apartment and has to. there is no point, since his brother seems disinterested in speaking to the kid. he rambles in his interactions with other people online but in person always cuts them short, seemingly uncomfortable with talking for too long.
the one activity that takes up most of his time, however, is training. at any hour of the day or night dave might be called to the roof. bro owns the entire building, and no one has ever called in anything about the striders. if they have, it was taken care of quickly and quietly and nothing ever got to the people who might have done something with it. bro watches everything and this is how things go: dave goes up the stairs with a sword in hand and once he's at the top it starts and then it keeps going until it's over. sometimes it goes on past that. it can take hours on end or only a few minutes, and there isn't any way to predict which it's going to be. eventually dave's left alone and he lies on the roof for a bit until he picks himself up and goes back inside the apartment. he patches himself up quickly and efficiently and doesn't complain at all. the most he has ever done is inform john egbert he got his ass kicked, and john assumed dave was exaggerating like dave always does.
here's another thing to notice: dave strider is used to being watched. he's paranoid about it, trying to read from every tiny clue in his life what will happen next and coming up blank. so when there's an extra pair of eyes he notices after a few hours, and he doesn't like the feeling. he picks himself up off the roof and ignores a broken wrist and too many cuts to count and probably a few cracked ribs in order to lean over the edge of the railing, eyes scanning surrounding buildings with a tense little frown.
it's pointless to tell bro. it might be bro. is he supposed to confront the change or ignore it? it's impossible to tell when bro wants him to roll with something or dig his heels in, and if he can't figure it out quick before the inscrutable time limit runs out, bro will probably be disappointed. and also maybe mad? it's hard to tell if bro ever gets mad or anything else at all, but dave would like to avoid that eventuality and measure up, so...
so.
right.
he can't spot who might be watching him but he didn't expect to. he can never spot bro in the apartment, either. so maybe he needs to change the location? maybe this is counter-surveillance training. it's not the usual so it has to be something else, after all. he's too tired to think it through but that doesn't really matter because there's probably a time limit and he shouldn't be too tired for it so he can't be.
the next day dave will completely disregard his usual daily schedule and leave the apartment. his injuries are taken care of even if he's oddly careful about his wrist, a makeshift brace involving a wrist watch making it casual. dave can always make his walk seem easy and relaxed no matter what he's hiding. he doesn't go to any of his usual locations. instead he goes to the movie theater, wastes precious grocery money on a ticket for a random action movie, and immediately ditches through an emergency exit in the theater once he's zipped in.
he loiters around out of sight to see if he can catch anyone coming out after him.
there are a dozen other little trips and traps like that planned if his simple first-ditch effort doesn't work as he zigzags around the city with absolutely no gameplan, testing the waters to see what comes up. there's no possibility of waiting for probably-bro to explain himself, because bro doesn't do explanations. so. time to figure out the rules as best he can and hope it's what he's supposed to be doing.
the lack of any ominous texts to his phone is either encouraging or terrifying. dave can't be fucked to figure out which it is, exactly. ]
EPISODE 2: the latvian mob
EPISODE 3: a concussion
EPISODE 4: bench talk
EPISODE 5: break-in
[ what would someone following the number connected to dave strider notice during recon? well.
dave strider, thirteen, gangly and edging on getting taller but way too skinny, angular and bony in a way that says he could stand to eat more food more often. he constantly wears shades. he equally constantly wears long-sleeved shirts and jeans in the houston heat. dave is too careful to ever let that shirt ride up enough to show what's underneath, and he never lets his shades get jostled off his face in public.
the kid has more of an online presence than his brother. he runs a webcomic with an avant garde sense of style and some truly disturbing strips that occasionally seem to correspond with times his number has come up; he sells shit on the site sometimes, t-shirts or book compilations or keychains. the money isn't saved but tends to get spent on groceries. he trolls internet forms at random but does seem to speak regularly to at least three other kids, and has for at least three years. these conversations are all mostly superficial even though the kids are close. the deepest he ever gets in them is with rose lalonde, who lives in new york. sometimes they talk about his dreams.
to each of them he only has positive things to say about his brother, whom he idolizes.
the other half of his computer use seems to go to online school, which dave does all right on. he only occasionally misses deadlines, but more frequently turns shit in ahead of time. he participates haphazardly on the forums as required, but aside from an odd sense of humor and a decent grasp on the subjects, he doesn't say anything worth reading.
following dave in person is harder. he doesn't leave the apartment often except to go to the store, or occasionally the library. he has hung out in the park once or twice but always goes home the second his cellphone buzzes with a text. his interactions with other people are limited; he's polite and casually friendly and charming to the grocery store employees and the librarian, and he doesn't turn people away when they talk to him exactly, but he never discusses anything of note and always excuses himself pretty quickly. dave doesn't like to be touched and doesn't let it happen, never needing to flinch back because he moves faster than that, and doesn't let himself get in the position where someone will try to touch him.
at the store he gets apple juice and bread and peanut butter. or junk food that keeps longer, kept at the back of his closet. nothing he has to refrigerate or heat up. at the library he gets art and film books or photography collections or comics or shit like my teacher is an alien or animorphs or pretty much anything. he doesn't usually check them out to go back home, unless it's a thing for school. when he signs his name on anything it's a careful angular scrawl and he likes to do it in red - dave always keeps a red pen in his pockets. at the park he tends to sit on a bench with good sightlines and sometimes he'll feed birds bits of torn bread and sometimes he'll scroll through shit on his phone (tumblr, random sites, pesterchum) but mostly he just kind of sits there and listens to music.
he downloads a lot of music. sometimes he mixes up new shit and uploads it, sending it to his friends or occasionally just keeping it to himself. dave maintains some social media accounts but is weird about them. there are disjointed quotes or phrases and oddly angled pictures and he seems to treat them like some sort of joke only he gets, but he's almost dedicated to them like he doesn't seem to be to a lot of shit. there's a blog he used to update but doesn't any longer about tony hawk and other things and every glimpse into his mind through his words is unclear and a little off.
a lot of the time he seems to be in the apartment alone. he isn't always, despite appearances, and he knows it. there's a ton of surveillance equipment inside the apartment and dave treats the cameras and recording devices with a casual weariness and wariness. his brother is constantly monitoring both dave and the equipment; fucking with that would probably be a bad idea for anyone paying attention, but it might be possible to jack some of those frequencies, if you're careful.
inside the apartment he mostly stays in his room. when he comes out he's nervous and cautious but nothing ever shows on his face. even in the sanctity of his own room this is true; dave doesn't emote when he can help it and even when he jumps when a trap goes off, his expression doesn't change an iota. when he speaks his voice is low and too-texan, but he doesn't usually unless he's outside of the apartment and has to. there is no point, since his brother seems disinterested in speaking to the kid. he rambles in his interactions with other people online but in person always cuts them short, seemingly uncomfortable with talking for too long.
the one activity that takes up most of his time, however, is training. at any hour of the day or night dave might be called to the roof. bro owns the entire building, and no one has ever called in anything about the striders. if they have, it was taken care of quickly and quietly and nothing ever got to the people who might have done something with it. bro watches everything and this is how things go: dave goes up the stairs with a sword in hand and once he's at the top it starts and then it keeps going until it's over. sometimes it goes on past that. it can take hours on end or only a few minutes, and there isn't any way to predict which it's going to be. eventually dave's left alone and he lies on the roof for a bit until he picks himself up and goes back inside the apartment. he patches himself up quickly and efficiently and doesn't complain at all. the most he has ever done is inform john egbert he got his ass kicked, and john assumed dave was exaggerating like dave always does.
here's another thing to notice: dave strider is used to being watched. he's paranoid about it, trying to read from every tiny clue in his life what will happen next and coming up blank. so when there's an extra pair of eyes he notices after a few hours, and he doesn't like the feeling. he picks himself up off the roof and ignores a broken wrist and too many cuts to count and probably a few cracked ribs in order to lean over the edge of the railing, eyes scanning surrounding buildings with a tense little frown.
it's pointless to tell bro. it might be bro. is he supposed to confront the change or ignore it? it's impossible to tell when bro wants him to roll with something or dig his heels in, and if he can't figure it out quick before the inscrutable time limit runs out, bro will probably be disappointed. and also maybe mad? it's hard to tell if bro ever gets mad or anything else at all, but dave would like to avoid that eventuality and measure up, so...
so.
right.
he can't spot who might be watching him but he didn't expect to. he can never spot bro in the apartment, either. so maybe he needs to change the location? maybe this is counter-surveillance training. it's not the usual so it has to be something else, after all. he's too tired to think it through but that doesn't really matter because there's probably a time limit and he shouldn't be too tired for it so he can't be.
the next day dave will completely disregard his usual daily schedule and leave the apartment. his injuries are taken care of even if he's oddly careful about his wrist, a makeshift brace involving a wrist watch making it casual. dave can always make his walk seem easy and relaxed no matter what he's hiding. he doesn't go to any of his usual locations. instead he goes to the movie theater, wastes precious grocery money on a ticket for a random action movie, and immediately ditches through an emergency exit in the theater once he's zipped in.
he loiters around out of sight to see if he can catch anyone coming out after him.
there are a dozen other little trips and traps like that planned if his simple first-ditch effort doesn't work as he zigzags around the city with absolutely no gameplan, testing the waters to see what comes up. there's no possibility of waiting for probably-bro to explain himself, because bro doesn't do explanations. so. time to figure out the rules as best he can and hope it's what he's supposed to be doing.
the lack of any ominous texts to his phone is either encouraging or terrifying. dave can't be fucked to figure out which it is, exactly. ]

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[ he has no idea why this guy thinks he'll die, but he won't. dave spends his days in boring ways. he strifes bro, sure, but bro would never kill him. his brother is controlled in ways dave will never be. you can't kill someone in a fit of passionate rage if you don't have passion. or rage.
every hurt is directly intended in order to train dave to be something better than he is now. it will never go beyond that, and if it does...
dave supposes if it does, the plan has changed or he'll have become obsolete somehow. ]
Don't track my shit. You owe me fifteen bucks. [ and a new phone. ]
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Good counter-surveillance tactics.
[Fifteen dollars is now being offered to Dave.]
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ok like he wasn't being entirely serious but since dirk DID force him to spend fifteen bucks in order to figure shit out (he is not sure if 15 dollars and half a day is good or bad, regardless of the praise?) dave will take the fifteen dollars and put it in his own wallet. which is mostly held together with duct tape but has a few random sbahj stickers on it. ]
Not good enough. [ bro's right. he needs to do better. ] I'd say "later" but I'm hopin' you'll just, like, disappear. So.
[ he will...TRY TO GO HOME NOW??? christ he probably has to deal with rose, if bro hasn't cooked up something new or decided dave failed at whatever this was (dave is...sort of certain this wasn't bro? now? but he's not 100%). ]
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in fact the second he contacts them and tells them to meet back up at the library he gets yelled at.]
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dave...returns to his usual schedule? he does update his webcomic that night, and it seems to be a weird critique of batman, but as usual sbahj is dumb jokes and oblique content that no one can really make sense of. instagram gets a few pictures of a poptart from all angles and some weird comments about preservatives being the only thing anyone can count on in life. tumblr gets a thousand reblogs of purely random shit.
the strife that night is probably worse than usual because dave has to cop to having "lost" his phone and bro knows all his tells. for some reason he decides not to tell bro about the weird person stalking him. it's kind of pointless either way.
he unblocks rose and jade and john and gets scolded and tells them to chill, he spent all day in an intense water gun fight with his bro, couldn't have his phone distracting him. john and jade buy it immediately and he tells rose he had an argument with bro and ditched to go to the museum when she doesn't. he talks to her about the mars on life lecture and the mummies and she's suspicious but quiets down.
he does not dial the number and the paper was tossed before he ever got home after he glanced at it.
the batman comic does become a series, but it devolves into a critique of batman's fashion sense. this plotline is forgotten within a week, however. ]
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Dirk, in fact, watches every single Strife. Dave's number doesn't come up again, at least not for a while. Other numbers do. But Dirk checks in on footage of Dave conscientiously. He keeps up with his webcomics and his blogs. He doesn't read his conversations with his friends, but he watches every single Strife. Was the Machine wrong? Is this kid doomed to never get killed, just pummelled again and again and again?
Is that better? He can extract Dave from a potential murder. Nothing can extract Dave from this.
Dave becomes a problem, an obssession that he never lets go of. It bothers the others too but Roxy and Jake didn't fail him, Dirk failed here. Dirk couldn't figure out how to make a kid trust there was a way out. He couldn't figure out how to be a person.
Anyway either Bro tries to kill Dave or Dave comes across Dirk working another number, OR YOU FIGURE OUT SOME OTHER WAY TO DO THIS, LUCY!!!]
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watching every strife seems like an exercise in futility - much like fighting in them is. dave strider is a repeat number and he'll come up again and again but he always scrapes through. he knows how to stitch himself up one-handed or with a broken wrist and he knows how to set his own bones and he knows how to breathe through the pain.
but he's not the number dirk's chasing today so he's not the one who's being tracked, so he isn't on the radar, exactly, when he clocks dirk doing...whatever. tailing someone?
what the fuck is he wearing.
dave never bothers to move as fast as he can outside of the apartment or off the roof. he's too slow in both places by bro's standards anyway. and he's not sure he can tail dirk and his whatever-the-fuck he has going on, but also that isn't important and he can't tail the guy when the main thing that needs to be said is: ]
What the fuck are you wearin'?
[ at least he's low-voiced enough it won't draw dirk's apparent mark's attention. apparently dirk likes to stalk lots of people, not just dave. although hopefully he hasn't stumbled across dirk at an inopportune time in his operation? who knows. ]
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Dude. Not cool. I'm working. This particular one is leaning perpetrator, so try not to get me shot, ok, kid?
[He lets Dave go. Do not get him shot, Dave!]
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You deserve to be shot for what you're wearin'.
[ also: ]
What do you mean "leaning perpetrator". [ wait, hang on, he remembers most of the bullshit dirk what's-his-face spouted last time. ] You're tailin' someone whose number you got through dubious means? Do you even get paid for this. Do you get paid enough to buy clothes, because if so maybe they should pay you less, actually, and just pre-buy the clothes.
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[Dirk notices that Dave is tenses and Dirk takes a step back for him.]
Now, if you don't mind, I'm tryin' to keep someone from gettin' killed, and I don't know exactly who yet, so it's kinda tricky. If you aren't gonna high-tail it, please at least don't draw attention to us.
[He peeks out the alleyway? Is his person gone? Shit, his person is gone.
Oh he really hopes his cover has not been totally blown. Please let this be a lost mark instead of ruined cover.]
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[ oh my god???? oh my god.
dave debates high-tailing it, but it isn't like he has anything better to do with his time. bro doesn't need him currently and john and rose are both in school at this time of day, timezones nonwithstanding.
dave peers around the corner, too, just to see what dirk is freaking about. ]
You're not very good at tailing people, are you. Are you gonna use whatever cheat you used on me, or are you gonna sherlock it out yourself?
[ that...implies dave thinks it is possible to sherlock it out himself? which implies dave noticed something himself. both of these things are probably true. ]
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[Why are you doing this to him, Dave? He sighs, and he pulls out his gun. Because Dirk using a sword on the streets would just be too anime and I'm not doing it in a POI AU.]
No point in Holmesing when Moran's already rented out the house across the street. [Dirk takes two shots: both to two men around the corner, both to the kneecaps.] Move.
[He's seen the kid fight so he knows what he can do: he directs him to a wall with a balcony two stories up and he starts parkouring his (still fairly anime) ass up there. He knows Dave will be able to follow.]
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dirk is perhaps not the best about not pulling people into shit, dave thinks.
his survival instincts are strong enough that he'll get up to the balcony with no trouble, ignoring any injuries he has in the process. ]
Why are you shooting people? Are you goin' to shoot me? [ why the fuck did he follow dirk up there if he thought this was an option, more importantly? ]
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[To the balcony. Dirk is taking a defensive position so he can cover Dave while he gets them in. Dave you're now definitely in this. Open the door or they'll have to keep scaling and Dirk doesn't want to do that with Dave's injuries.]
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You would shoot me because you're clearly unhinged? [ duh. ] A dinosaur skull isn't a pet.
[ cool, but not a pet. like. for the record. ]
And our apartment doesn't allow pets anyway.
[ and door opened. bobby pins are so useful if you know how to abuse them. ]
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[Dirk pushes Dave in (there's another shot) and slams the door behind him. They are now in someone's apartment. There is distress.]
Sorry, just passin' through—
[And Dirk assumes Dave will be following with him as he pulls him along towards a flight of stairs. The plan is one flight up and then exit out the other side before anyone sees him.]
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[ dave does not follow immediately since he takes a moment to unleash charm he was never taught, although he can't do a whole fucking lot about gunshots and breaking in, but. may as well be polite?
his tone shifts to harassed immediately as he keeps pace, though. ]
You can at least pretend not to be a creepy fuck who's stalked me, for the record. That is a thing you could totally do?
[ JUST. MAYBE???? ]
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[Dirk knocks on a door—response. Next door—response. Third is a charm.] You're up, kid. [He once more takes defensive position while Dave can pick the lock for them? Dave has like. fifteen seconds max to do it or Dirk will just have to kick the door in because the only reason to pick the lock is to hide which room they went into, and if they are caught up with then that's pointless.]
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[ irritated, but he's good with orders despite himself, and way too fast. it will not take him even half of fifteen seconds to get the lock open. ]
Who are the people with guns? Does anyone actually like you, or does the world just generally hate you? It's because they think you're annoyin', isn't it.
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[Door open and door shut and locked. Dirk is out the next balcony, over a fence, and down onto another street. He immediately gets on a stopping bus, dropping change in for both of them. Now they're on their way and Dirk can stop worrying about Dave getting shot.
Not that he relaxes. Dirk does not relax, ever. But Dave will probably not die in the next ten seconds so that's fine.]
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[ they were out a balcony over a fence and down a street, but dave isn't out of breath.
HE'S STILL SUPER ANNOYED THOUGH??? ]
You didn't have to shoot them.
[ also fuck dirk he's taking a window seat. ]
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I'm a fuckin' idiot. Should've just talked to 'em, super idea, dude. How many gunshots did you hear?
[It was not just Dirk's two. There were three shots, the first so close to Dirk's it could easily have not been noticed. So Dirk's two bullets did what they needed to do: got one guy to aim just off, stopped the other one before he could shoot.]
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[ he's not an idiot. ]
Shockingly enough gettin' out of the way is an option, and one that doesn't, like, bust people's kneecaps up.
[ he's not entirely sure those people were wrong about shooting at dirk though. like. he hasn't talked to the guy much and if they'd met any other way (read: dirk hadn't been insisting dave was about to die, and refusing to explain what the fuck he was on about) dave might have liked him, but he can't bring himself to trust mystery asshole numero uno.
why did he follow this guy onto a bus? rose is right, he needs impulse control. ]
Three.
[ he can't help but belatedly answer the question. ]
At the start, anyway. Were you askin' for the grand total?
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[Dirk. Cannot believe this??]
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[ look
he feels bad that dirk shot people?????????? ]
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I DID ALL OF THE LAST TAG ON MY PHONE, PRAISE ME
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